Submitted by Brenda Willman
Time is quickening, will I get to all I intended?
From poor beginnings my soul needs to be mended;
so often (it feels like) I am being offended
though wiser souls might say I have tended
to take things the wrong way.
How does one misconstrue utter disdain?
Words carry feelings; no one can feign
that they were not intended to cause real pain;
they’re words to let me know that I am the bane
of your existence.
Spending a lifetime trying to please;
Spending a lifetime trying to appease;
looking for acceptance while on my knees
begging, so that someone sees
I just want to be liked.
Broken little girl; an adult now
Starting each day with a firm vow
to continue to genuflect and bow
to those who don’t seem to know how
to treat her with a spark of kindness.
What is the sum total of this wife
who’s lived for six decades rife
with negativity, disease and strife;
constantly struggling to pull the knife
out of her back?
She knows that love comes from inside.
People have pried, they chide and guide;
she tries but there is nowhere to hide
from all pride-filled ones who lied
about who she really is.
She is nothing but good old soul
hiding in her tunnel like a vole or a mole,
or covered up with an overturned bowl,
only wanting to meet her goal
of meeting approval each day.
A smile that is meant for her alone.
Could someone throw her a bone
and leave their perfect comfort zone
and prove to the world she not’s made of stone?
Because she will smile back.
And then she will make her way off to cry.
The small kindness makes her fly
above the heavens, so high in the sky
believing she can ultimately die
with love and joy in her heart.